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Top Signs Your Presidential Campaign Is In Trouble
Created by jerrdog on 7/19/2011 12:40:40 PM


So Newt Gingrich's presidential campaign is already $1 million in debt.  So on that note, I thought I'd post some other signs that your presidential campaign is basically screwed_

-  Your campaign rallies leave more people disappointed than "Zookeeper".

-  Your only campaign promise is to cleam up Washington....DENZEL Washington.

-  Your liason with gay voters is Tracy Morgan.

-  In order to pick up more youth voters, you carve a lightening bolt in your forehead.

-  Your slogan is "Hope and Change...and METH!"

-  In the latest Arizona poll, you're trailing a Mexican. (Ouch)

-  When you lean in to kiss newborn babies, they mace you.

-  Your stances on issues change as much as your sex does.

-  You blew all your campaign funds on those red, white and blue foam hats. 

-  "Bringing Sexy Back" is your slogan...even though you know it's take years and trillions of dollars to actually bring sexy back. 

-  Giving your speeches in Auto-Tune is the only way to get anyone's attention. 

-  You skipped a human rights rally to get a good spot in line for "Harry Potter". 

-  Reporters describe you as "Tim Pawlenty withouth the charisma."

-  Even after you give him your e-mail password, Rupert Murdoch won't hack into your phone. 

-  The only social media you use is MySpace. (Nice)

-  Campaign bus?  No.  Campaign VAN?  YES!

-  Your strategy in New Hampshire and Iowa is to focus on the black voters. 

And finally-  You get visably aroused whenever you hear the word "caucus". 

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